Rock Bottom & Diggin...

by Becky

Part 2

You can read Part 1 of Becky’s story in the archives

During the beginning of 1999 my friend asked me to go to Bassline with her, it was there that once again a fire was lit inside me, I really felt something but I was afraid to let it out, I really didn't want

I really felt something but I was afraid to let it out

to make a fool of myself and I was scared. It was after going to Bassline that she invited me to go to her church. When I was there I saw how different a church can be I didn't know what to make of it, the music wasn't the hymns that I was used to there were actually drums, electric guitars and bass guitars playing modern

I saw how different a church can be

songs which I could relate with I really couldn't believe that there were Christian songs sung in Church that didn't involve an organ and old English texts.

My friend saw that I was interested in Christianity and she new I had a semi religious background so she asked me to go to CCYC with her and also I was invited to Beach Mission. I was really worried that CCYC would be too heavy going and I would have Christianity shoved down my throat. After going to

I was still self harming and suffering from low self esteem

Beach Mission and hanging out with people who were Christians, I began to feel a lot more comfortable with the way I was feeling although I was still self harming and suffering from low self esteem.

When the time arrived for CCYC, I was very apprehensive but straight away I met new people. During the week I felt touched by God and the testimonies. Then one night after a powerful testimony I committed my life to God, I felt warm again I talked to some one about my self harming and they told me that every time I did anything to myself I was doing the same to Christ whilst he was dying on the cross for me, the

CCYC had a real effect on me and I can honestly say it has changed my life

image this created really got to me as I tried to cope with resisting the temptation to self harm again. CCYC had a real effect on me and I can honestly say it has changed my life.

Although I still suffer from low self-esteem I have a close group of friends who I can easily talk to around me when I need them and also I now have God in my life. I do still find it hard but with good friends and God you can get through your troubles.

Ephesians 2 v4 Psalm 28